Disclaimer: The below is solely intended for informational purposes and in no way constitutes legal advice or specific recommendations.
A healthy relationship–it’s the dream, right? Many of us are looking for “The One,” or at least “The One for Now.” In our quest to find them, we all have our own dating deal breakers that will rule out potential partners. Some are perfectly reasonable, some are totally superficial (and possibly detrimental), and some are essential to our mental and physical well being.
Scour the internet and you’re bound to find some crazy nitpicky deal breakers — along with the red flags you definitely don’t want to ignore.
What’s That Smell?
Personal hygiene is a giant deal breaker for many daters. Showers, deodorant, grooming habits, teeth brushing, and nail clipping are all at the top of the list of things most people expect their partners to attend to regularly and in a hygIenic fashion.
‘If You Can’t Handle Me at My Worst…’
It’s important to receive emotional support from a partner. We can get it from friends and family, but an S.O. should be able to answer your S.O.S. and is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader, shoulder to cry on, etc. If your partner can’t be there when you’re down, they don’t deserve you when you’re up.
The Slacker Generation
Ambition and confidence go a long way in attracting a partner. If you’re slacking off in your professional life, your personal life might take a nosedive, too. A lack of drive is a big deal breaker for many people.
Giving someone the silent treatment, ghosting, negging, catfishing, or playing any other kind of mind game could be a stop sign for many potential partners. Communication is key.
A negative attitude could be more than an annoyance. It could be a sign that you’re in a toxic relationship. Who could blame someone for breaking it off over demeaning, belittling, and criticizing remarks? A good partner should build you up, not tear you down.
Picky About Pets
OK, this one might be a personal preference, but it makes sense. If you have a dog or cat and your date hates pets, it’s not likely to work out. Allergic, too? That could be a deal breaker for the other person. No one wants to move in with a partner if they’ll have to be hopped up on allergy meds 24/7.
The Micro Cheater
Cheating is an obvious deal breaker for most people (who aren’t in open relationships), but micro cheating can be harder to define and spot. The micro cheater might downplay their relationship with you, spend a lot of time interacting with the object of their desire on social media, or even share intimate information with someone else.
Any Kind of Abuse
This is the biggest deal breaker, and it should be a deal breaker for anyone. If you have a partner who is emotionally or physically abusive, you need to have a serious talk — and then get out of the relationship ASAP. Your overall well being is at stake and very much dependent on your decision here. Healthy relationships can be cultivated, but if you’re with an abusive partner, there may be no fixing it.
It can be hard to gauge new relationships and whether the person you’re dating is right for you. One way to suss out any potential toxicity is to do a bit of research into their background. You may be able to find out if a person has a criminal record, or if they could be lying about their age, name, and more.